行！咱來English Bay扭琴 (Let’s go and play music by English Bay)

[李秀]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYOJIa-OdF0

台英雙語散文

　　日頭予烏雲掩咧，青草咧走揣地面的伴。花蕊予風佻弄到東倒西歪，楓葉仔舞到嗖嗖叫，滿四界是新鮮的陰柔。做了瑜珈（YOGA）三步數：氣喘入、禁氣、吐氣，規个早起想欲編一个花環，來迎接異國的新奇，但是花蕊滑溜溜位手縫跋落來；想欲唱一首歌，抒散佇台灣囤積的工作壓力，但是嘴舌頭仔雄雄打結，歌聲消失佇天界線彼粒久久無愛出面的寶石。因為汝講無日頭就無想欲去本來咱約束好，到English Bay海邊扭琴的計劃。
　　母親對音樂的綿爛，位細漢就囥佇恁姐弟的身上。五歲是學習的起頭，我就予汝開始接觸音樂。
　　「為啥物我愛練琴？」牽著汝五歲的小手，欲去老師的所在練琴，汝攑頭按呢問。
　　「我的寶貝！汝是老母藏佇心甘底的願望。當我猶閣是少女的時，彼種欲展開的花蕊，普普仔佇我的心內蟯蟯動。有一日，汝佇我青春的身體釋放，親像天光晉前的一片昲光。汝的生命溪水停偎佇我的港口，汝的喘氣是我暝日的焦點，汝的氣候變成我的起起落落。當然，我的樂符，就是汝的旋律。」當然即馬汝無可能了解我的話，希望有一工汝會知。
　　自按呢，莫扎特、貝多芬、柴可夫斯基⋯⋯是咱母囝交流的橋樑。汝嘛已經會當體會著生活的歹流擺，正是美麗樂章的養料。是啊，觸動內心的旋律，往往是位坎坎坷坷的心靈爆發出來。
有一冬，汝選著世界大學先生的時，接受電視的訪問，汝嘛誠自然講家己的琴藝，是位母親的腹肚內就開始矣。歡喜偎倚港口，彼个生命的溪流，終其尾佇日夜護航當中，會當往闊寬的河流，勇猛泅向大海。但是當等汝有能力家已領帆的時，卻是航向「飯店管理」参原初主修的音樂是完全無仝的潮流。這股雄雄冲來的倒流，沖到岸邊的風景全然失色。佇暝深人靜的台灣島，我流著目屎敲電話予當咧佇美國波士頓音樂學院讀冊的汝的阿姐，分訴母親的願望，干單靠伊來完成矣。
彼个暗暝朦朦渺渺當中，有一寡物件看來親像幻影無定著。我只有等待天光的時刻，我彼个注目的焦點倒轉來。感謝上天，當我醒起來的時，伊眞實披掛著規身軀的彩虹，金光閃閃笑咪咪向母親拽手拍招呼。
　　將窗仔門拍開，日頭照入內，汝位瑞士出業轉來，位一个生份的島嶼吹來一陣涼爽的春天氣息。原來音樂佮飯店管理，一點仔都無衝突，而且是互相牽成。
　　我的心向來是曠野的一匹馬，只是時間参空間無容允我胡亂狂奔。現此時我已經會當佇汝的專業世界隨意飛踅。有一遍咱作伙去美國旅行，就予我感受著汝的遮蔭，享受著彼片歡樂奔騰的世界。汝講細漢阮攏予恁用上好的，大漢了後汝嘛欲予阮用上好的。我享受的不但(m̄-nā)是比佛利山莊五粒星的豪華飯店，嘛聽到雙腳踏著飽滇的土地，像琴子響起的音樂。
　　阿姐初初做人的老母，予人綁佇華美的束縛內。我想廿幾冬後，伊嘛會参我仝款，游走佇回饋的溪流當中，歌唱生命的延續。雖罔講，現此時頭毛已經翻白，不而過，擁有的愛是繼續咧開花結子。我有一粒向望的心情，隨時接受血汗孕育過的幼芽，伊即馬伸出一大片的青色和風，予我會當拍開心內的門窗納涼舒爽。
　　2000年的夏日正中晝，母仔囝散步佇温哥華Burrard Bridge，攬抱著English Bay的海風，遠遠看整个Downtown Vancouver以及Granville Island之間的懸樓参帆船點點。一向驚曝日頭，若遇到赤炎炎的日頭攏會閃bih，這款動作時常予汝恥笑。但是現此時我誠歡喜面對，因為日頭下汝活力十足。步行當中紅貢貢的面容專心咧解釋旦即(taⁿ-chiah)讀了的《牧羊少年的奇幻旅行 The Alchemist》的故事，相互討論一个西班牙牧羊人的奇遇。聽講遠方一个神秘金字塔的所在藏有奇妙的寶物，佇尋尋覓覓的路程中，雖罔講，老早就揣着無料算的金銀財寶，但是為著眞實佮任務，伊嘛是繼續進前。
　　當等peh山過海，斬除種種的困難達到目的了後，卻是發現啥物攏無。厭氣嗎？bē用得！路草當中所纏隨來的痛苦佮快樂才是重點嘛是所講的「寶物」。無實行按怎會知影有抑是無？這个寓言親像有予汝一點仔提示。人生這條路講複雜其實嘛脫離不了愛、快樂、健康参財富等等的四種步數。
　　頂著日頭走佇國外，不時掀開快樂的寶箱。佇家己的國度內底，因為工作的關係咱顛倒無若濟時間作伙。情是快樂的源頭，愛情、友情無法度強求，干單親情會當因為血緣的脈動（你講輸血予別人嘛是血緣），我誠珍惜而且硬硬掠咧無欲放。嘛是因為家已對親情的思慕才行寫作這條路。我的理念是愛情誠可貴，但是親情的價值愈較無限。我佮汝的老父虛心接受少年人的思考方式，親密的關係才袂因為理念的無仝產生距離。另外我誠認真運動，身体若健康，就減少日後恁的負擔。
　　你知影無？親密的關係對人的影響，1950年代哈佛大學做一个調查，126个學生参父母的關係，以及35年後遮的學生的身體狀況。結果發現，参雙親感情袂和的學生當中，有百分之九十一有嚴重的病，包括高血壓、十二指腸潰瘍、酒狂；参父母感情好，特別是参母親有良性互動的學生，干單百分之四十有類似的病症。這款的現象顯示童年佮雙親的關係，影響日後的健康。
好玄是本性，若準小小的幼芽位小樹蕊內puh出來，就會當予我一路歡喜袂煞，親像規个路面攏青翠起來，這是我一向的慣勢；愛大海的闊寬佮寧靜，就算落雨天抑是大日頭嘛直直行無顧危險。我愛海的程度，予汝不時按呢講，母親有可能前出世是海龍王的查母囝。頭毛由烏變白，但是年輕的本色猶然存在，應該有足額的喘力参意氣風發的汝仝步佇旅程中創造新奇、探索新的天地。是我幸福？抑是你會曉掠牢機會共同享受天倫之樂？因為汝毋免親像義大利的一个歌手費南迪，因為母親早早過身，有名了後四十冬來伊到每一个所在演唱，攏帶十字架参伊母親的相片。伊講伊的成就是受母親的影響，每句的歌聲攏蘊含母親對伊的保庇，伊欲將歌聲唱出對母愛的孺慕，予每一个天涯的浪子位旅程中感念母親的慈愛。
歡喜汝無像老母赫綿精綿爤對親情的偎靠，病態嗎？毋是！心念是尖利的，它綿爛佇某一點就永遠袂踅走。現此時，我已經做人的阿媽，但是嘛時常佇夢中走揣雙親的慈顏，雖然生離死別幾若十冬，暗著想的彼粒心照常纒纒滾。
　　人講往生的人親像秋日葉片的恬靜，在生的人親像夏日花蕊的嬌豔。當下上重要，夏日的花葉向心情拽手，咱母仔囝用餐佇Davie Street時常大排隊的希臘餐廳。配酒、點菜、参服務生的對談有汝的專業。生活的禮節以前是我教你，即馬換汝來引導我。地球是圓的，生命過程應該嘛是這款樣！但是有時仔我會貪戀佇恁細漢的時天真的形影。
　　「汝感覺阮細漢較可愛，是因為汝會當控制。」敢是按呢？想像力誠豐富，但是這點我m̄-bat想過。有可能位生命血汗所經營過的，特別叫人刻骨銘心吧。靠佇明亮的大窗仔邊，一爿哺食神話王國希臘的餐食，一爿欣賞加拿大這个北美洲有大溶爐（Multitude Pot）特色的多彩人種來來往往。日頭光像璀璨的琉璃傾倒過來，但是無像台灣的日頭歹鬼鬼
　　「老母有進步，毋驚日頭曝矣。」
「按呢温柔的日頭，莫怪西洋人愛曝日頭。」
　　插雜佇白人當中，家己黃色的皮膚感覺怪怪，不止是生活上、語言嘛完全無仝，經過太平洋國際的換日線，時間也暝日顛倒，遮真正是一个生疏的國度，但是有汝的導路相伴，雖然生份卻是真實加安心。我即刻想著泰戈爾（Rabindranath Tagore1861-1941）的詩「英雄」，中晝後佇外國軟軟的日頭腳，心頭澎湃想起欲讀這首詩來：

　　母親！請汝想講咱當咧旅行，經過一个生份危險的國土。汝坐佇一頂轎內底，我騎著一匹紅馬，佇汝的身軀邊綴咧走。是黃昏的時陣，日頭已經落山矣，約拉地希的荒山野地灰暗展開佇面頭前。大地是一片的淒涼加荒蕪。汝開始驚惶了，想著毋知咱走到啥物所在阿。我對汝講，母親！無要緊，有我佇遮⋯⋯

　　讀阿讀，唸阿唸，竟然唸出感動的目屎。目屎顯現佇我上佮意的詩人泰戈爾捌行過的痕跡。
這个國度對汝來講親像魚仔落水，甚至閣減少睏眠來感覺假期的延長。汝家己儉腸虐肚，但是對家庭卻是慷慨大路；佇台灣工課了後認真拍廣告，汝講按呢就算袂當隨時佇阮的身邊，阮嘛會當佇電視看到汝；若有小可成就歡喜参一家口分享汝的光榮，但是遇著無順序卻是毋敢予阮知影，驚序大人煩惱（這點應該愛修正）。對厝內的人的搭心，親戚朋友攏羨慕。干礁老父袂愛旅行，就干單我獨獨來享受。老父嘛按呢表示，有這个囝仔導伊老母蹉跎，伊就放心了。
「我毋敢向同事講我是参老母作伙出來旅行。」
　　「為啥物？」旦即欲夾一尾紅蝦的手雄雄吊佇半空中。
　　「汝目睭看覓，敢有像咱這款的組合？」
　　無錯，大部份攏是雙雙對對的愛人，無者就是全家伙仔，或者是少年人的聚會。但是親情並無輸愛情阿，汝看彼爿就有一對快樂自在的母囝？干礁in的年歲大概比咱少廿幾歲吧。
　　「汝袂感覺我這款年歲是應該陪愛人蹉跎才對？」
　　當然！當然！汝的生命閣少年，汝的道路閣誠長，汝一口喘lim食阮予汝的愛，就轉身走離開阮了。汝有汝的遊戲，汝有汝的遊伴，若無時間佮阮作伴，若無心思想到阮，無要緊！阮就誠自然，佇老年時刻有眞濟閒工去計算過去的日子，共手內失去的物件不時佇心內疼痛。流佇河流唱過的歌誠緊就流去別位，衝破所有的堤防。但是港口卻猶閣留佇原來的所在思念遠航的船仔。泰戈爾詩中的紅馬如今親像汝浪走的形影，我時常共花攬牢佇心頭，但是花的刺卻刺疼我規身軀。
　　「老母，我即馬搭船去Granville Island買菜，汝好好佇飯店看冊、寫作、畫圖，等我轉來煮幾項汝愛食的菜，好無？」
　　甜蜜四序坐佇The Landis Hotel & Suite的玻璃桌仔，提出汝位香港買予我的炭筆開始來畫素描，一爿等著我專屬的服務生推出佳餚來。原來汝是我這生上閃熠完美的作品，我按呢心滿意足發出我的心聲。
　　「氣質、才調是我家己培養出來的。」啊！閣來矣，汝親像青翠俊媠的大欉樹對埋佇土腳的根講：「我的挺拔佮汝應該無啥物關係吧。」
我了解上天攏會恩威交接對人講：「我愛你，所以愛處罰汝；我醫治汝，所以愛傷害汝。」無管好天抑是落雨天，無管汝閣質疑母親是毋是會當照顧別人，或者是有法度煮出幾項好食的菜餚。終其尾我嘛是保存原有的歌聲佇港口守護，向望三不五時湧起的嘩嘩滾的波浪，予伊一帆風順泅向美好的未來。我隨時抱著瀝清過的雜質，予我唱清明的歌曲，享受清芳的日子。
我歡喜我有限的時間，會當佮汝姐弟作伙彈奏，我彈鋼琴、汝扭小提琴、阿姐扭大提琴。幾若冬前，咱两人被邀請佇台仔頂，汝談音樂我講文學，母囝對談來分享予別人。佇人生旅途的舞台，我坐佇轎內，你騎一隻紅馬，轉踅佇轎的四週圍。無論經過光明或者烏暗的交替，干單親情的緊密才會當輝映宇宙的天體，相互對應永遠的記印。
　　烏雲漸漸散去矣，日頭露出微微仔光，是你心心念念的好氣候。來！我幫你提琴，汝家己提樂譜，親像當年仝款。行！咱來English Bay扭琴！

Let’s go and play music by English Bay
I want to sing a melody, to relieve stored up domestic working pressure, but my tongue is suddenly knotted. The sun is obstructed by the dark cloud that catches it. The maple leaves happily whirl and dance with great energy in the breeze. The sky fills with fresh hazy air beautifully, gently. After yoga, I want to arrange a garland to greet the marvelous adventure of a foreign morning, but the fantastic flowers are difficult to decorate. The singing sound of a violin makes the sun vanish, now unwilling to beam with joy on the horizon. You, my son, say that without sunlight, you do not have any desire to play the violin at English Bay. My dear, it was our agreement - why do you break it so easily?
I have enjoyed music very much since my childhood and expected you and your sister to study piano and violin. The age of five years old is the best time to start music education, and I wanted you to connect with melody as young as possible.
“Why should I learn to play the violin?” I held your tiny hand as we walked to your violin teacher’s place for the first time. You looked up at me to ask.
“Ever since girlhood, my heart has been opening its petals and preparing for you. One day, you were in my youthful arms, like a glow in the sky before the sunrise. The river of your life anchors in my harbor. Your breath is my dedicated focus day after day. The wide range of your emotions carries me up and down. Certainly, my notes are your melody.” Of course you didn’t understand what I said, but I hoped you would some day.
Therefore Mozart, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky are the bridges linking us. In a television interview, when you won a Mr. World competition, you also admit that your musical talent started from my pregnancy. Joyfully you walk through life, escorted by the Sun and the Moon, toward a broader future. When you have the ability to control your own life, you switch to hotel management which is a totally different direction from music. This adverse current crashes into the shore and the beautiful scenery fades away. Angry tears stream down my face. I call your sister at the Boston Conservatory to tell her about her mother’s unfinished dream.
In that unclear deep dark night, I see many illusory and puzzling images. I wait for the sunrise, wait for my focal point. When I wake up, he is already dressed with the rainbow in the dawn light and waves to his mother.
Yes, the window opens, the sunlight arrives, you return from study in Switzerland. It feels like a sudden cool spring breath from a hot unknown island. Music and hotel management apparently do not conflict, but complement each other. From now on I’ll find more pleasure in all your abilities.
My spirit is like a wild horse, but my age is not. Now, I am able to recognize your hotel expertise. Last year, we traveled to Los Angeles. You say that when you were little, we educated you well. Now that you have grown up, you want to do the same for us. At that moment, not only do I enjoy staying at the Regent Beverly Hills, but I also hear a song like a hill stream among its pebbles.
Your sister just became a mother. She is tied up in the gorgeous fetters of a marriage. Twenty years from now, she will also sing of life as a circling brook. Although my hair is gray, I will have love unceasing, blossoming and bearing fruit. I am in a glorious mood to accept your efforts to help and support me.
In the year 2000 on a summer afternoon, we are walking on Burrard Bridge. We embrace the sea breeze of the English Bay and look out toward the downtown Vancouver skyline and sailing boats. You always tease me that I worry too much about exposure to sunlight. At that moment I accept the fact joyfully because under the sunlight you are so energetic.
While we are walking together on the bridge, you describe the book you have just read as your handsome reddish face gets tanned from the sunshine.
The Alchemist is a Spanish shepherd’s story of his travel. It is a fable concerning a treasure located in a remote mystical pyramid. In spite of quickly obtaining wealth, the shepherd continues his journey. Finally, he achieves his goal after he has completed many puzzling and arduous tasks. Actually, he also discovers many things which he had not known before. Following the painful path often results in finding treasure. Without actually attempting it, how can we know if we can achieve our goal or not? This fable seems to give you some enlightenment. What completes life? It is actually nothing more than four steps: love, joyfulness, health and wealth.
Walking in the sunlight in the foreign land with you, I often open this cheerful box and enjoy it. In our country, because we have our own careers, we do not meet often. I believe that blood relationships form the strongest bonds. You tease me that if you donate your blood to a friend that is also a blood relationship. Although romantic love is valuable, the blood relationship is totally the strongest. Therefore, I always hold onto blood relationships tightly. Your father and I are modestly trying to catch up with the new generation’s thinking, so that our communication will not be too different. I also keep myself in good shape and eat healthily in order to reduce your burden when I get older.
Do you know the effects of having an intimate relationship? According to a study by Harvard University, 91% of people get serious health warnings when having trouble with parents. These include hypertension, duodenal ulcers, excessive drinking and so on. On the other hand, only 40% of people have the same problems when they have a good relationship with their parents. This shows that one’s relationship with parents in childhood is linked to future health conditions.
Even though there are many wrinkles around my face, my heart stays youthful allowing me to follow your steps and explorations of the new world. Is that my understanding of happiness? Or do you know how to retain family happiness? You do not need to be like an Italian singer whose mother died early, so that once he became famous, he always carried his mother’s picture when traveling. He said his success was affected by his mother. Each song contained his mother’s influence. He wanted to express his music so that it reflected his mother’s love.
I am so relieved that you are not like me who has always been too devoted to the memories of my parents. Is that morbid? No! The mind is so sharp that it sticks at every point and cannot move because the ongoing importance in my life of remembering the love of my parents. Now, in spite of becoming a grandparent, I often think about my own parents’ benevolent countenances in dreams. Even though they passed away decades ago, in my deepest heart, I can still feel the bitterness of their loss.
Life is like beautiful summer flowers and death is like autumn leaves. Yes, at the present time, the most important thing is that summer beckons with its magnificent floral display setting the mood. Now, after a long wait in line, we are dining at a popular Greek restaurant on Davie Street, selecting wines, ordering food and interacting with our waiter; these things relate to your profession. I taught you life and etiquette when you were a child, whereas now you teach me western manners. The earth is round and so is life. But sometimes I still prefer your naive manner as a child.
“You feel we were more lovable when we were kids, but that is because we were controllable!”
Really! You needn’t have said that. I don’t agree with you.
Sitting by the window, not only do I enjoy the Greek meal, but I also enjoy watching the melting pot of Canada walk by. What a big multi-cultural country!
Despite the strong sunlight, it is not as hot and strong as Taiwan’s.
“Mother is already used to the sun’s exposure,” you said.
“The sunlight is so gentle here that no wonder Westerners enjoy it so much,” I responded.
I am a yellow-skinned woman among whites. Not only is the language totally different, but also day and night are inverted. This really is an unfamiliar nation. Fortunately, having your company, my son, I feel I am in a comfortable environment here, although it is a strange land. I extemporaneously recite Rabindranath Tagore’s poem “The Hero”,
Mother, let us imagine we are traveling, and passing through a strange and dangerous country. You are riding in a palanquin and I am trotting by you on a red horse. It is evening and the sun goes down. The waste of Joradighi lies wan and grey before us. The land is desolate and barren; you are frightened and thinking you do not know where we are. I say to you, mother! Do not be afraid, you have me here…
I am moved to tears. I am touched by and beyond Tagore’s words all the time.
Living in this country, my son, you are like a fish that swims in water by yourself. You shorten your sleeping time in order to extend your vacation.
You are good at saving for yourself but you are generous with your family; you used to do perform in TV advertisements, you said that even though we couldn’t be together, we could still see you on television; you like to share your achievement with us even it is just a little one, but you don’t like us to know about how frustrated you get when we worry about you (you must revise this idea). Anyway, you treat us so considerately that our relatives and friends admire your behavior. Your father doesn’t like to travel - only I enjoy it. But your father is happy that you accompany me when I travel.
“I don’t feel comfortable letting my colleagues know that I am traveling with my mother.”
“Why?” I was surprised as I was enjoying the dinner.
“Look around, there is no such combination like us in the restaurant.”
I respond with no words. Yes, here there are only couples or group of friends gathered together.
“Don’t you think that it would be more “reasonable” for me to have this kind of romantic dinner with my lover?”
Sure! Sure! Young is your life, your path long and you drink the love we bring you and then you turn and run away from us. You have your play and your playmates. What harm is there if you have no time or thought for us? We, indeed, have leisure enough in old age to count the days that are past, to cherish them in our hearts. Now I can see you are running like the red horse in Tagore’s poem. I long to hug flowers tightly, but I am always stabbed by thorns.
“Mom, I am going to take a boat to Granville Island to buy your favorite foods. You stay in the hotel and do whatever you want. When I come back I will cook a 4-course dinner for you.”
I enjoy doing my painting in the Landis Hotel, waiting for my personal chef to cook for me.
“Oh, yes, you are the most gorgeous work I have even made!”
“Really? I don’t think so. My temperament and the talent are not from you. You gave me nothing.”
Come on, you seem like the grown green pine talking to its root; “I am tall and strong, but it is nothing related to you.”
I seem to remember God said to people, “I love you, therefore I punish you; I heal you, therefore I hurt you.”
Whether the sky is clear or cloudy, you are always thinking that a mother should be looking after others or cooking several delicious foods. As a matter of fact, I still understand the harbor’s melody; this song of mind will wind its music around you, my child, like the fond arms of love.
I always take pleasure within my limited time with you and your sister. I play piano, accompanying your sister’s cello and your violin. Enjoying music with you both is such a treat for me.
A few years ago, we were invited to share our experiences at a golf club in Taiwan. Your topic was music and mine was literature. In real life, I sit in the sedan chair and you ride the red horse around the palanquin. Whether it passes through brightness or darkness, I believe that only you and your sister, my dear, can shine eternally like the universe.
The dark cloud gradually disperses; the sun reveals itself with a smile. It is good weather, which you like. I bring the violin; you carry the music, like we did many years ago when you were a child.
Let’s go and play music by English Bay!

[李秀]

Mr. Brown Coffee的電視廣告,扭小提琴的囡仔,就是我的後生,分享予我的朋友.